UK Counselling Services

My husband walked out one Saturday morning – literally – no row, no explanation…

My husband walked out one Saturday morning – literally – no row, no explanation, nothing! I wasn’t aware he had left me for nearly 12 hours and then the panic set in. What was I going to do, how was I going to cope on my own. I had been married … for 20 years. I battled with the one question I had no answer for – Why did he leave? I couldn’t talk to my friends about this so after about 6 months I decided to seek outside help. I met Johnathan early in November. I wasn’t sure I was going to go back after the first session… but I did. I knew Christmas was going to be a struggle – how would I deal with waking up on Christmas day on my own. We talked about everything, there were no hiding places, sometimes I thought he could see straight into my thoughts – he knew what I was going to say before I did. But he never pushed me, never made me talk about something until I was ready. When you are struggling to find the right words to express yourself, he has this uncanny knack of summing up what you want to say. I learnt so much about myself through counselling. This is going to sound like a real cliché but I found the whole experience cleansing – I could talk about anything, say anything and he never judged me, but at the same time he helped me find some answers to the burning question of WHY? I still don’t know the real answer, but I have stopped beating myself up about it. It’s just not important anymore. I discovered who I really was – another cliché – but the only way I can describe it. At work I was a confident outgoing business woman who knew her own mind. At home I played this role – the wife- and I didn’t realise I was doing it. Counselling helped me work out which was the real one and I am a much more content person now. Without counselling I would have struggled to come to terms with what had happened and would only have seen it as a negative. Johnathan helped bring some perspective to the situation and made me appreciate my life and all the positive things that were happening to me. It gave me a renewed confidence in myself, even my friends said they could see a change in me. I am now in a new relationship – it is much healthier – no more treading on egg shells. I spent 20 years trying to fulfil someone else’s expectations, now I am who I am.

Laraine, Hertfordshire